The week back from Galway, I promptly fell apart and had a major breakdown. I'd been fighting it off over the week, but without distractions I finally collapsed. I still feel like it's Sunday (that's how slow I am), I've been crying every day, every night, unable to concentrate on anything. I can't think, I can't talk, I can't read, I can't do any work whatsoever. The longest I've been able to stay on one idea is watching stupid comedy shows onine. I mean, this is difficult, right here, and this isn't even a real entry.
So... it's very bad. Thank you to those who have e-mailed me, or messaged me on Facebook. If my mother is reading this: you may have to take me to a doctor, if you want to take me anywhere, when I get home... a proper doctor. This is neither normal nor healthy, and if I hear another counsellor tell me "You're stressed" I'm going to scream in made-up languages and throw up all over them, and see what they think of that.
I said I would update my blog with actual things, but that may take a while yet. I have to somehow write a paper this weekend, and that's bad enough, even without exams coming up. I don't know if I will pass my exams. I may not have earned a passing grade on my last paper (I don't know). I don't know if my GPA will survive if I fail a class, and I don't know who to ask or what to do. If you know, or can help me, please do. Please.
I have to stop typing now because I'm crying again and I'm in the library.
*hugs lots of hugs* Hang in there alright? I'll try to take some cute rat pictures this weekend to help cheer you up okay? Just hang in there. And go eat some chocolate, it helps.
ReplyDeleteHey Darlin', No worries. You're mom will be there for you, for sure. And as are as passing or failing? So if you fail you fail... you try again when you're ready. This is obviously not a good time for you. Lincoln failed at just about everything... right up until the moment he was elected President of the United States (at a very bad time, I must admit). The point is, as long as you learn something when something goes awry (even if you're not immediately aware of it) you'll find that stepping stone, and you'll use it, and you'll move to the next place.
ReplyDeleteI'M HERE MEGHAN!!! I've been offline all week because of taking Lochlan and Caroline to Orlando. I will take you to a "proper" doctor as soon as you get back to the states.
ReplyDeleteI will email you in the morning. I LOVE YOU AND WE WILL GET THROUGH THIS!!!